The Best:
#3 Belgarath The Sorcerer by David Eddings
#2 Stranger in a Strange Land by Robert A Heinlein
#1 Where The Red Fern Grows by Wilson Rawles
The Worst:
#3 Chitty-Chitty Bang Bang - Worst movie adaptation book ever!!!
#2 Any biography/autobiography about someone who has been dead for less than 100 years.
#1 Anything by Robert Jordan

Polgara the Sorceress from the David Eddings books. She is well aged, infinitely wise, imminently powerful, and gorgeous.

I don't think anyone has ever been happy working at walmart. I do think there is a dream job, but I also think that most people never find it. As for what I want to do, my dream is to be a college vocal music instructor. How am I working toward that? I'm not currently. That is something that requires at least five years of college and I am going through a custody battle that is draining me dry. So, no dream job for me. Just mindless drudgery.

I once watched Dune all the way through with only one potty break. (the version with Sting)

Tuna Salad Sandwich:
Ingredients:
1 6oz can chunk lite tuna in water
1 boiled egg, yolk removed, diced
Miracle Whip Lite to taste
Sweet Relish to taste
Wheat or whole grain bread

Drain tuna, break into small pieces. Add egg and stir. Add a large spoonful of Miracle Whip. Stir. Add a medium spoonful of Sweet Relish. Stir. Season to taste. Consistency should be moist but not runny. Spread on bread and enjoy. Goes good with navel oranges.

Updating the old resume and making it look right. And the waiting. Oh, the waiting kills me.

Slow, gentle, teasing, loving sex. The kind that lasts for hours.


And green tea.

Speakers are vital, sometimes headphones just won't cut it, but the gadgets that I CANNOT live without are my mouse and keyboard. I have a microsoft Trackball Optical 1.0 that I have replace with an identical one three times over the last 5+ years. My keyboard is a Microsoft Natural Multimedia(ergo) that I adore. This is the third one I have had of this model. If I have a choice, I will never use anything else.

Well, I think that most important is a spill-proof surface and keyboard. Also, kill the trackpad and put a side-mounted trackball(used on laptops from the early 90's). I think that the standard plastic shell should be forgone in favor of a more durable material, maybe an alloy of some sort. Shock absorbers is a must, and a good speaker set. Also the power adapter port is one of the most common parts to break on laptops, so that should be reinforced in some manner. It should weigh less than a standard laptop, but it could also be a little smaller. A keyboard with slightly larger keys would also be a plus. Putting colored outlines on the keys, marking which keys are used by which hands in typing tutor programs. Also including typing tutor, net nanny, and key logger programs(only accessible by parents) would probably be a good idea. It should come preinstalled with something similar to the Comodo Internet Suite(free firewall and antivirus in a single program) and either AdAware or Spybot S&D. Also, since this will be a first computer for many children, a multi-boot system should be offered from the manufacturer so that children have the opportunity to learn multiple OS's. Some learning games, and a few non-learning games should be included, as well as full kid-friendly tutorials for all the included programs. iTunes should come preinstalled, due to the prevalence of iPods and iPhones today.

Any of the first five. My personal fav is five but thats just me.

I don't know about youth, but I moved to Oklahoma two years ago and it was a big fucking mistake.




Edit 09/19/2009:

No longer think it was a mistake.

There is a small red rocking chair(toddler sized) that my great grandfather made when my grandma was a baby. It went though her, my dad and his two brothers, my and my four siblings, and has been given to me for my daughter.

You're a 90's kid if:
You can sing the rap to "The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air"
You know that "WOAH" comes from Joey from "Blossom" and that "How Rude!" comes from Stephanie from "Full House"
You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
You remember reading "Goosebumps"
You know the profound meaning of "Wax on, wax off"
You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
You danced to "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls, Females: had a new motto, Males: got a whole lot gay-er. (so tell me what you want, what you really really want.)
HELLO....HOT WHEELS!!!!!
You remember the craze, then the banning of slap bracelets and slam books.
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence...Not...
Where in the world is Carmen San Diego? was both a game and a TV game show.
You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green Ranger were meant to be together.
You remember when super nintendos became popular.
You remember watching home alone 1, 2 , and 3........and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"
"I've fallen and I can't get up"
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players
You remember New Kids on The Block when they were cool
You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By The Bell"
You played and/or collected "Pogs"
You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet or Nano and brought it everywhere
You watched the original Care Bears, My Little Pony, and Ninja Turtles
NANCY DREW AND THE HARDY BOYS WERE THE BEST MYSTERY BOOKS
Yikes pencils and erasers were the stuff!
All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.(pencils.notebooks.binders.etc.)
You remember when the new Beanie Babies were always sold out.
You used to wear those stick on earrings, not only on your ears, but at the corners of your eyes.
You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
You know the Macarena by heart.
"Talk to the hand" ... enough said
You thought Brain would finally take over the world
You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"
You remember when everyone went slinky crazy.
You remember when razor scooters were cool.

When we were younger:
Before the MySpace frenzy...
Before the Internet & text messaging...
Before Sidekicks & iPods...
Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX...
...Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.
When light up sneakers were cool.
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
When gas was $0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was a new thing.
When we recorded stuff on VCRs & paid $3.50 for a movie.
When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off our walkmans.
When the Chicago Bulls were the best team ever.
Tag.
Get Over Here!!!! means something to you.
Hide-n-Go Seek at dusk.
Red Light, Green Light.
Heads Up 7 Up.
Playing Kickball & Dodgeball until your porch light came on.
Hopskotch.
Tree Houses.
Hula Hoops.
Captain Planet.
Running through the sprinklers.
That "Little Mermaid"
Crying when Mufasa died in the Lion King.
Happy Meals where you chose a Barbie or a Hot Wheels car.
Getting the privilege to sit in the front seat of the car.
Drinking Sqeeze It "Squeeze The Fun Out Of It"
Or what about:
Hey Arnold.
Rugrats.
The Secret World of Alex Mac.
Rocco's Modern Life.
Are You Afraid of the Dark?
Doug.
Magic School Bus.
Aladdin.
Pinky and the Brain
Sailor Moon.
Blossom.
Beavis & Butt-Head
Wishbone.
Bill Nye the Science Guy
MR RODGERS!!!!
Where everyone wanted to be in love after watching The Wonder Years.
Under the Umbrella Tree
PEE-WEE!!!
The Big Comfy Couch
Kool-Aid was the drink of choice.
Class field trips.
When Christmas was the most exciting time of year.
When $5 seemed like a million, & another dollar a miracle.
When you begged to go to McDonalds for dinner everyday.
When Toys R Us overuled the mall.

Go back to the time when:
Decisions were made by going 'eeny-meeny-miney-moe'.
Money issues were handled by whoever was banker in 'Monopoly.'
Being old referred to anyone over 20.
A chance to skate as a couple at the local roller rink was like winning the lottery.
When Ninja Turtles ruled the world.
When Aladdin was new, before the trilogy was complete.
Before we realized all this would eventually disappear
Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much!!!!!

Written by a 15 yr. old School Kid in Ohio :
New Pledge of Allegiance (TOTALLY AWESOME!)

Since the Pledge of Allegiance & The Lords Prayer

Are not allowed in Schools anymore

Because the word 'God' is mentioned...

A Kid in Ohio wrote the attached:

NEW School prayer:


Now I sit me down in school
Where praying is against the rule.
For this great nation under God
Finds mention of Him very odd.

If scripture now the class recites,
It violates the Bill of Rights.
And anytime my head I bow
Becomes a Federal matter now.

Our hair can be purple, orange or green,
That's no offense; it's a freedom scene.
The law is specific, the law is precise..
Prayers spoken aloud are a serious vice.

For praying in a public hall
Might offend someone with no faith at all.
In silence alone we must meditate,
God's name is prohibited by the state.

We're allowed to cuss and dress like freaks,
And pierce our noses, tongues and cheeks.
They've outlawed guns, but FIRST the Bible..
To quote the Good Book makes me liable.

We can elect a pregnant Senior Queen,
And the 'unwed daddy,' our Senior King.
It's 'inappropriate' to teach right from wrong,
We're taught that such 'judgments' do not belong.

We can get our condoms and birth controls,
Study witchcraft, vampires and totem poles.
But the Ten Commandments are not allowed,
No word of God must reach this crowd.

It's scary here I must confess,
When chaos reigns the school's a mess.
So, Lord, this silent plea I make:
Should I be shot; My soul please take!
Amen

I pee in bushes. With the stuff I eat, I am pretty sure that's toxic.

OTTERS!!!!

George Ellis Cave 1922-2006 Served in the Army during the Korean War. Was stationed in Guam, working as an engineer. He is my grandfather. I miss him.

I used to have an '88 Olds Cutlass Calais, basically a four door rollerskate. I was in the back hills of southern Indiana in July of '99 and I encountered about a 40 degree downgrade, with a hairpin turn at the bottom. When I entered the turn, I hit a patch of gravel and went straight sideways into an eight foot deep ditch at about 35 miles per hour. The car was completely totaled, yet I was completely unharmed.

My favorite is thus:
On the chest of a barmaid at Yale,
Was tattooed the prices of Ale.
And upon her behind,
for the sake of the blind,
Was the same information in Braille.

I love that one.

I yell at kids to stop running through walmart(I work there)